Thursday, March 07, 2013

Survivor: Caramoan - Alpha Betas - 26.4

First of all, it finally arrived today, & I just want to say it was worth it.  Thanks for the inspiration, Matt - now I know what to do the next time I want to see a horrified look on my husband's face &/or receive a buff from Probst.


After the loss of Hope, the Alpha Betas are pissed off.  The nerds have almost kicked them out of the frat house completely, & they aren't taking it well.  Sherri defends her alliance like a Mama Bear, but Eddie is in mourning.  "We got rid of Hope tonight because she was the prettiest one here, & she was a threat to everybody because of that."  Eddie's mind is reeling: A hot (but not as hot as me - that's just the way it is) Filipino huntsman is probably on his way to present Sherri with Hope's heart right now.

Over at The Faves, The Specialist thinks himself a great leader, & is taking tips from what Napoleon did at the Battle of Waterloo.  Fun fact: I have visited the site of that battle, & I know (as do you, probably) that Waterloo is where Napoleon was defeated.  I guess he was too busy giving out names like "True Grit" & "The Enforcer" to his troops.
@robstaboobuzzer, thanks for this.

Our Napoleonic Specialist decides to give out names to everybody, to keep them happy.  It makes sense, especially since this alliance is parading about with their nicknames & cooling lid-hats, but there are 2 problems: Brandon can see through this plan (BRANDON!!), & Andrea doesn't feel special anymore.  "So, what, are we gonna give Brenda a name?  I mean, seriously."  She feels as betrayed as if Shemar Moore had made promises he couldn't keep.

Brandon actually impressed me in this moment with Phillip, because his excitement during the naming ceremony seemed genuine.  Boy's got some acting skillz.  "Phillip is supposed to be able to discern who's lying to him.  I'm lying to him - this agent sucks bag!"  Phillip names Brandon "The Conqueror", Erik "The Silent One" (I guess the editors ran with this one), & Brenda "Serenity".

Could Phillip be a browncoat?

Off to the Reward Challenge, where 2 people from each tribe have to be moved from platform to platform over water using square planks that must be untied.  The whole tribe then has to swim out to a taller platform, where they must all be on or above the top section.  The first tribe to do this wins a visit from a local bushman who will help them around camp, & prepare a meal with all the fixin's.

The Favourites make it out to the tall platform first, but The Fans are not far behind - it really comes down to the different strategies used.  The Faves all stand together while The Fans have Shamar curled up with everyone standing on him.

This doesn't leave much room on the platform for anyone else, & Matt never finds a spot to stand on.  The Faves win, although Shamar, at the bottom of the pile, doesn't seem to realize this.

The fine work of @robstaboobuzzer again.

His misinformed victory-gloating is shut down pretty quickly & Shamar Smash is activated as he splashes the water in a comically dramatic gesture.

Reynold blames the loss on Laura, & wants to vote her out, as she's the weakest.  Yes, she was very hesitant on the planks, but it really came down to the strategy, & the fact that one of their tribe members is way bigger than anyone on the Faves.  They were never going to win this challenge.

The Faves get their visit from Tata, who Dawn calls a "Filipino Jesus", & Malcolm calls a "Filipino Gollum".

Tata shows them how to cook rice in bamboo, cleans up their shelter, & makes them a delicious dinner.  Cochran says, "We got a sense of how he functions.  And the way he functions is basically saying enigmatic little things that nobody understands."  Tata then dances with the ladies, prompting Cochran to say the words "bump & grind", endearing Cochran to me even more.  You just can't get cuter.

Someone else I find myself adoring is Michael, who is charming while complaining. "The Favourites have everything - they've won every Reward, so they have this bounty of stuff back at their camp.  I mean...sons of bitches!"

Shamar is not quite so charming.  After the Reward Challenge, he's right back to lying in the shelter, demanding that Sherri bring him rice.  Even Sherri is fed up at this point, but she brings him the rice anyway.  Shamar starts complaining about his eye, & while everyone dismisses it as Shamar being Shamar, the medical team has to be brought in.  After an examination I can't watch because gross, they determine he has to be pulled from the game.  Probst tries to dig in for some tears, & asks, "Do you feel, in some way, even though it's not your fault, that you're letting your tribe down?"  Probst is rewarded with the largest fucking tear in the history of the world.

Take that, Meehan.

Shamar leaves to pretty monotone "Sorry, Shamar"s, & The Fans head to an Immunity Challenge which involves swimming, climbing, smashing, unlocking & throwing.

Matt does so well that Sideshow has already made an exclusive statue of his performance.

Despite The Fans' best efforts, The Faves get to the last stage well in advance.  Reynold does a kick-ass job of catching up, but it's not quite enough. Phillip wins it for The Faves & is greeted with cries of "You ARE The Specialist!"

The Hotness & The Handsome know they're the next to go unless they can change some minds.  Reynold knows this because they're on the outside as the only Cool Kids left.  Eddie thinks it's because they're now the 2 best-looking people on the tribe.  That's just the way it is.  Reynold sees Matt & Michael splinter off, & he thinks they're off plotting the Alpha Beta's demise.  Unbeknownst to Reynold, Matt is trying to convince Michael that the smartest move is to get rid of Laura.  Michael is taken aback, as he assumed his alliance would stay strong, & not leave Mr. Awesome with the idol.

Mr. Awesome

Matt tells Reynold, "I'm no dumbass" - he knows they need Reynold for the challenges.  Matt says Laura "was breathing heavy after trying to unlock locks."  Aw, come on, guys!  She never proclaimed herself to be in decent shape, & you never know when a puzzle challenge could pop up. 

At Tribal Council, the Alpha Betas campaign for physical strength.  Laura says Sure, I'm the weakest - but if "numbers were jumbled over the next couple of days, & we all ended up on different tribes...are Eddie & Reynold going to be as loyal as our alliance right now, or are they going to be more willing to jump ship?"  Eddie offers strength AND loyalty, saying that if he is kept, "I'm gonna feel a lot differently about this tribe than I do right now".

Time to vote, & Reynold plays his Hidden Immunity Idol.  Turns out he didn't need to - the third YBB in a row is voted out, this time unanimously.

While I agree that at this point the tribe has to start winning challenges, I don't know if this was the right decision.  Shamar's evacuation really sucks - I don't think he would have been a big help in the Challenge, but it was clear The Fans were finally ready to let him go, & it would have been an easy vote.  I liked Laura a lot & wish I had seen more of her.

I'm always up for Survivor conversations, so don't forget to "Like" this blog on Facebook, & follow me on twitter: @MomofKai

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